One of my goals for 2023 was to experience more “peak experiences” - those intense moments where you feel like you’re truly alive. For some, it might be skiing a double black diamond; for others, it might be going on an exotic vacation. But after reading Awe, I realized that much of what I was looking for was…awe. And fortunately, experiencing awe doesn’t require you to take a ski trip or vacation to the other side of the world.
Awe: The New Science of Everyday Wonder and How It Can Transform Your Life by Dacher Keltner
What is Awe?
Keltner defines awe as “the feeling of being in the presence of something vast that transcends your current understanding of the world.” Awe can come from seeing towering mountains or 500-year old trees. It can come from listening to a piece of classical music that we find moving. Other people can be a source of awe, too - seeing others’ acts of generosity and kindness is often awe-inspiring.
Awe is universal and we express it in universal ways - peoples from across cultures utter vocal bursts like “whoa” when facing awe-inspiring moments.
What happens during awe?
We feel part of something bigger than ourselves. As Keltner puts it, it takes us away from our "default self”: the part of us that is “focused on how you are distinct from others, independent, in control, and oriented toward competitive advantage.” While our default selves help us move forward in life, it can cause us to focus too much on ourselves, which can lead to anxiety, rumination, and depression. Awe helps us get out of our own heads and feel connected to the broader world.
What are ways we experience awe?
One large category is moral awe - being impressed by others’ generosity, courage or kindness.
Engaging in common activities with others, like dancing, singing, or even walking. These shared experiences lessen the boundaries between us and other people, making us feel part of a larger whole.
Art, like music or paintings.
Religious rituals and traditions.
Witnessing the cycle of life, whether the birth of a child or the peaceful passing of a loved one.
Thoughts and reactions
I appreciated the discussion of awe in everyday things. For example, Keltner suggests going on “Awe walks,” where you go for a walk and try to view things with fresh eyes - examining the detail of a flower or savoring a sunset. Unlike other pleasures - like eating candy - we don’t adapt to awe, but get better at experiencing it the more we do. As corny as it sounds, part of experiencing awe is simply allowing yourself to be moved.
Part of what’s hard about experiencing awe is that it’s all very earnest. A lot of us (me included) can resist being earnest at times - it’s much easier and lower-risk to be cool, unimpressed, and cynical. In many cultures, we view being able to “hold it together” and being unmoved by external events as a positive. Experiencing awe, on the other hand, means explicitly acknowledging that something (or someone) has impacted or moved you and showing a level of vulnerability.
Everyone will likely have their own “awe playbook.” What works for me won’t necessarily work for you. That being said, much of what generates awe - large crowds and communal gatherings - is less present in in our lives now than it might’ve been a generation or two ago.
There were some parallels to How to Calm Your Mind and Four Thousand Weeks - all books encourage savoring and trying to truly experience life as opposed to being in control and only obsessed with productivity and accomplishment (which the default self will push us to do).